Well I'll Be A Monkey's Uncle

I'm disturbed by that expression I used in the blog's title. When exactly did someone think it up, and was there a situation in life that this person faced where he had to actually admit to being the uncle of a monkey? If so I'd like to hear more of that story.

But in the meantime, more of MY story. I know, I know...it's been almost 6 months since last you heard from me. Fear not my little butterflies, I am still alive and writing more than ever. It's just since this whole pesky Lyme disease business took over I've been concentrating on my Lyme disease career, which is also known as TREATMENT. Treatment sucks, I won't go into it. But I did start a website devoted to Lyme disease and all that it entails, if you want to check it out http://lymebites.com you now can.

So beyond the whole almost dying from a bacteriological (I've learned some new words in the past 6 months, hold on tight and grab a dictionary, I know the demographic of my readership doesn't always teeter on the high end of the IQ totem pole) infection, what else have I been up to?

For starters I left Albany at the end of January. The cost of my Lyme disease treatment is now approaching $40,000 out of pocket and I've been out of work for over a year, didn't give me much choice but to move home for a while. I've been on IV medicine since February, so the timing worked out perfectly.

But living at home at the age of 36 after leaving at the age of 18 is not fun, no matter how sick you are. The important thing is nobody has been arrested or sent to the hospital yet, and the neighbors have not called the police...so far I think we're ahead of the game.

Lyme has royally fucked up just about everything, other than my sex life. It's a daily struggle to get the life I once had back. The cool part is I'm just one of hundreds of thousands of people across the world in the same boat I'm in. (Which happens to be leaking, I'm constantly trying to get more water out than is coming in...think about that as a metaphor for my life right now).

Chances of me returning to my career in the world of Budget are not looking great right now. Disability isn't looking too appealing either (mine starts in October), so I think it leaves me no choice but to find a new career, one that is conducive to someone with Chronic Lyme Diseae. So far this is my list:

Lunchlady

Okay, I didn't say it was a big list. But I can't help but feel I need to reach higher than that, so what ideas do you have? (Please, no pyramid schemes, just pyramids (not the Egyptian kind, the cheerleader kind)).

In all honesty though, as much as being sick has sucked...it's been a cloud just full of silver linings. My involvement with Lyme disease activism and awareness, as well as the Lyme community has been a truly amazing experience. May is Lyme Disease awareness month, so I've been very busy (in between bouts of vomitting and mind-numbing pain) with a national Lyme disease awareness campaign called Paint May Lyme Green. As part of that I've been pretty busy and active with the local media, as well as the national Lyme disease community. It's been pretty cool meeting such great people and being part of a different side of life for a while. (But I wouldn't suggest it if you're looking for something "new", chronic illness is not all it's cracked up to be...he he, I said crack).

I do apologize for my absence, but please feel free to follow things on the Lyme website, and take comfort in knowing the Wizard is back...I gotta find a way to support my Bath and Body Works addiction, so for now this is my best bet.

A special thank you to those of you who have been so supportive through all the craziness of the last year...your rewards for sticking with me shall be grand, and I don't mean homemade with materials bought from Michael's craft store.

We are beating this disease, me and the voices in my head individually, as well as the Lyme community as a whole. It's an exciting time to be sick, and in a way I'm lucky I didn't get some typical boring terminal illness, I get one for LIFE...but one that's full of excitement and controversy. It's like MTV's the Real World, only with fewer fake boobs. So stick around for some booty thumping good times...the Wizard is glad to be back. (Sorry, I will no longer talk about myself in the third person using an imaginary title).